10 reasons why I am better than you

1.) Pretty sure I don't have an STI.
2.) I'm not a massive pikey
3.) I have standards
4.) I have a befitting sense of fashion
5.) I know what befitting means
6.) I have life prospects
7.) I have Monty
8.) I have an ACTUAL job
9.) I have an ACTUAL car and an ACTUAL license to drive it
10.) My hair is nicer

Yknow,